Mom's Lemon Raspberry Muffins {and My Not So Little Secret}

Most recently my grandmother, upon giddily guessing my pregnancy before I formally announced it said:“Oh! You’re going to be a wonderful parent because you’re funny and resourceful and kind and a hard worker. You solve problems and you are beautiful.”I had to write it all down because it made me chuckle. I love that she said “I’m funny” first, because that’s the best compliment in the world I think. Give me all the funny people and things.Recently, I’ve had some wonderful, strong, incredible women I love and admire congratulate me in person, or through emails or texts or phone calls or comments on our pregnancy and it all fills up my soul like rain in a bucket. Thank you. I had one most recently, (I refer to her as a lioness because she’s dang right regal) came up and kissed my cheek and congratulated me saying,“It will be the hardest, most rewarding thing you will ever do. There are unspeakable joyous moments to come. I’m just so happy for you.”John and I keep playing guessing games as to whether or not our babe is a boy or a girl. We don’t know yet. We find out in a little less than a month or so. (I’ll tell you I promise.) I love surprises and until I know the gender of our babe I’ve held off on really looking at any baby stuff. It’s almost my way of easing into it all. Enjoying the fact that I haven’t barfed in a week, that I was actually hungry enough to eat two tacos for dinner the other night and that no one can really tell that I’m pregnant yet. I can, but it still feels like a secret to the rest of the outside world.

Well, no one can tell except for this one really funny girl who caught me dipping french fries in my chocolate shake on our date night. She worked at the restaurant and upon sweeping the floor around us, she gasped, catching my dip and said, “Are you PREGNANT?!” We had shared a conversation before when we were ordering food so it wasn’t as invasive as it sounds. ;) I laughed and said, “I am!” That was her invitation to gush about her little son and how fun it was to pregnant. “Oh man, do you know what you’re having yet?” I shook my head no. “Oh when I found out I was having a boy I was SO stoked. Race cars, trains, super heroes and mud!” She made some whoosh sounds like a race car. “Oh my gosh congratulations! This is so exciting. I'm so excited!”I laughed out loud. Some people are just contagiously happy you know? I answered, “I totally know the feeling. We’re pretty stoked too.” John who wasn't exempt from the weirdness chimed in, “And we actually dipped our fries in chocolate shake before we got pregnant.” (I love that pregnancy turns me into we.) She made a face and said, “You are too funny.” I laughed, “I know!” Then I leaned across the table and said to John, “My grandma told me so.” ;)

“Motherhood is still the biggest gamble in the world. It is the glorious life force. It’s huge and scary - it’s an act of infinite optimism. ”

— gilda radner, comedian and actor

A note to any of my friends out there who are having trouble getting pregnant. I only know a tiny smidge of the heartache one feels when longing to have a child. It took us way longer than I had planned. I in no way am saying my pain, compares to your pain especially with this most recent news. I don't know your story. But I haven’t forgotten what that ache feels like, so just know my heart goes out to you sweet and brave women, and I have no doubt, with God, a strong heart and brains, anything is possible. Whether that be through waiting, or through a doctor’s help, adoption, fostering, life style changes or simply loving on the little ones you’re already surrounded by in your family. Whatever you choose and whatever happens, don’t be discouraged and keep your hope. If there is one thing I know to be true it is this: things always work out if we believe they will. Love you friends. xops. My friend Jenn made the apron I'm wearing above. She's crazy talented. Like, there's nothing she can't make. I love her and all her realness as much as I love this apron. Of all my aprons, I seriously wear this the one most. She's a new mama too. Check her out here and here.

MOM'S LEMON RASPBERRY MUFFINS

adapted from Pillsbury Bake-Off CookbookThese muffins are totally nostalgic for me. I find that being a mom soon makes me turn to my own mom a lot, asking her question after question. I texted her the other day asking for her lemon raspberry muffin recipe. She told me the cookbook she got it from (an old 1990's Pillsbury cookbook) and I made some tweaks to the original recipe. Turns out my mom made the same exact tweaks I did when she made them for me growing up, even though we never discussed it until now. So, to me, that makes these muffins all the more magical. They’re easy and so good. xo

• 2 cups  / 250g all purpose flour / 204g spelt flour / 260g whole wheat pastry flour (mom always used all purpose)
• 1 cup / 200g sugar (preferably organic)
• 3 teaspoons baking powder
• ½ teaspoon of salt
• 2 eggs (preferably organic)
• ½ cup / 113g unsalted butter (melted and slightly cooled)
• ¼ cup / 60ml lemon juice
• ¾ cup / 175ml whole milk (cream or half and half)
• 1 tablespoon lemon zest
• 2 cups / 250g fresh or frozen raspberries (frozen are a little easier to work with. and if you'd like these muffins with a little less tang, only add 1 cup )

1. Preheat oven 425° F / 220° C  Line a muffin tin with muffin liners.
2. Mix flour, baking powder, salt and sugar in a large bowl.
3. In a medium bowl, mix together your lemon juice, melted butter, eggs, milk and zest. Make a little well or dip in the dry mixture. Add this wet mixture to your dry flour mixture, pouring the liquid into the well. Mix until all of the ingredients come together forming a thick batter. Gently fold in the frozen raspberries. Be careful not to over mix.
4. Bake for 18-22 minutes. Muffins should be golden brown on top and not look wet. Serve with butter and maybe a little drizzle of honey or lemon curd. These muffins are zingy through and through, so don't hesitate to add a little more sweetness. ;)

You can use any type of flour for these muffins you choose. I've made them with all of the flours mentioned below before and they're all fantastic. All purpose flour yields a more "cupcake" type treat and the whole wheat or spelt flours keep it a proper breakfast muffin. I imagine they're great in a gluten free version but I didn't get around to experimenting (yet). For gluten free: I imagine a brown rice flour mixed with an all purpose gluten free flour or oat or buckwheat flour, would all equally be great.