It was a completely loaded question, but I had to ask it.

"what's one thing you think i really need to work on?" i asked my husband.he looked at me like "uh, what?"while he was "thinking" my mind drifted back to this story i heard recently.i listened to this retold on a podcast somewhere - it was an experiment done in the 1950's (which i feel explains a lot) where a group of wives were asked to go home to their husbands and ask them what 6 things they felt they needed to work on.i know, listening to this made me squint a little when i was listening to it, but i had to listen on. 

So this one wife asks her husband to and handing him a piece of paper said, "Please write down 6 things you think I need to work on."

the husband took the paper, a little baffled and then the next day, sent his wife a bouquet of a dozen red roses with a note in it that read  "i love you and i am grateful you are my wife. you are perfect, just as you are."the wife was so touched and surprised by this kind gesture from her husband that the word quickly spread that her husband not only sent her flowers, but didn't think that a thing needed to be changed about her. she knew this wasn't true, she knew she wasn't perfect, maybe 100 things felt she needed to work on, but this was exactly what she needed to hear. i shook my head from my thoughts and quickly told john,"it's totally a loaded question, you don't have to answer it. i feel like this is something unhappy people would ask or something."

ROASTED JALAPEÑO AND GOAT CHEESE SAUCE

adapted from Sara Forte of Sprouted Kitchen's new cookbook, Bowl and SpoonSara is one of the most kind-hearted, beautiful + brilliant people and i'm envious of those who get to call her a close friend. i also really love her food and because this sauce is so easy and pairs well with so many things, it's basically a staple in my house.*please note that I adjusted the recipe by swapping the originally called for pasilla peppers for 4 jalapeños, simply because jalapeños were what I had on hand. In changing the peppers, I also changed the title of sara's recipe.tip: i de-seeded the jalapeños making it for a mild sauce, but add some seeds or cayenne if you want more heat.

• 1 small shallot (peeled and roughly chopped)

• 4 jalapeño peppers (split and seeds removed)

• ⅓ cup / 78ml extra-virgin olive oil

• ⅓ cup / 53g toasted pepitas (pumpkin seeds)

• 4 ounces / 113g soft goat cheese (chèvre)

• 1 teaspoon honey

• ½ teaspoon chili powder

• ¼ teaspoon cayenne pepper

• 1 lemon (juiced)

• 2 tablespoons red wine vinegar (I had white wine vinegar on hand and it worked beautifully)

• ¼ cup / 59ml water

• 1 cup / 40g cilantro (coarsely chopped)

• 1 teaspoon sea salt

• ½ teaspoon freshly ground pepper

1. preheat the broiler. rub the jalapeños and shallot pieces with a drizzle of olive oil. place them on a parchment lined baking sheet and broil them for 12 to 15 minutes until blistered and limp. let them cool. Sara suggests rubbing off the skin of the peppers, but i didn't care to do that (you guys i can be SO LAZY in the kitchen) so whatever you do, rest assured that both methods work, in my opinion.

2. in a food processor, combine the shallot and the jalapeños, the remaining olive oil, goat cheese, honey, chili powder, cayenne, lemon juice, and vinegar and process until combined. add the water, cilantro, salt, and pepper and give it another pulse until combined. taste for salt and pepper or maybe a little more heat. store in a sealed container for up to a week.